First, thank you for the warm wishes you all sent on my birthday – it’s a month late, but never too late. I am so bad at this whole reaching out business, and promise to be better at it. Nevertheless, it was a wonderful birthday.
Second, this is my annual birthday post: I was supposed to write one a month early (that was the plan), but it didn’t work out – which brings us to today. I ended up going home and spent time with family, which basically made my entire year.
Every year, I make this little reflection post and pour a bit of myself every time. This one is no different. I’d like to think that each one I put out there is a step ahead from the previous one – a better and well thought of version. I don’t know how much you’ve read of me, but I hope you’re getting a thing or two from this one.
Now, CROSSROAD. I rummaged through my travel photos and found this one. It best sums up how I’ve been feeling lately, what zone I’m in. Every birthday, I turn sentimental, and I don’t know why – for the most part. Then again, our journey to self discovery brings us to discover bits and pieces about who we are. What have I been up to all this time? Why the sentimental tone? Took me about 2-3 birthdays to figure this one out before I was happy with the answer to my own question – make no mistake, I am my worst critic; I am twice as hard on myself than I am on anyone else. I become sentimental, because I always look back at my whole life, or at least what I remember of it, and feel waves of emotion; mostly gratitude and all sorts of everything else. Is that what getting old does to you? I guess it’s not about “old”, but getting more experiences adds to your substance. I don’t know how to put it, but you know what I mean – the “it’s not the years in your life but the life in your years” cliché.
I’m at a crossroad. I don’t even know why. All I know is that, I feel that way about life in general. It feels like a chapter is about to close, and I’m on to something unexplored. I was here before, I dove into it and gave everything. I ended up with more than what I bargained for. So, why not? I sure am. When the loose ends are tied, I’ll be on my feet again.
There’s quite a few of us who are cynical about this whole live your life thing. But, I say this to you: DON’T. You have the whole world on your palms. What are you going to do with it? Live in your own terms; burn that bridge; climb that mountain; break that barrier. You are doing just fine. Carry on and you’ll get there. Trust in the journey and have faith that things do work out.
Don’t let anyone dull your sparkle.