I have not written anything in a while so I’m brushing up my skills here.
Now that 2015 is almost behind us, I look back at the year and the amazing things that happened – good or bad, it doesn’t matter. And I do all of that and I always have this image in my mind: I was 6 or 7 years old, about to start school and your almost 50-year-old self having a conversation about how important going to school is, among other things that you’ve been teaching my siblings and I.
Fastforward to 20 years later and we are where we are because we were all meant to be here, right this very moment. We’ve made the choices we’ve made because ultimately, life will take us here.
I have nothing but love and gratitude for you (and mom) for being who you are. We will all eventually learn to fly, but I will never forget that it is you who gave me my wings – and it has taken me to places I’ve only imagined, almost to a point of insanity.
You have given me so much that I could not imagine another possibility of not having you as my father. The least I could do is to try to give you your remaining dreams and aspirations before you go.
Speaking of, I know that age is starting to take its toll on you, and I can not tell you enough how terrified I am at the thought of losing you. I can not imagine life without you in it. I know I’m being silly when you bring up your readiness to go and join God, but my one most fervent prayer to God is that He keeps you healthy enough while we both work on your remaining dreams before He takes you with Him.
You are the light I’d look for when it gets dark. Yours is the only approval I will ever need. I think about all the horrible things and I am reminded that I always have somewhere safe I can go to. I mess up and fall down, get wounded and bruised, but you are always there, ready to take on the world if I needed a break.
I will take everything you’ve given me as we move forward to 2016. I’m ready to create new memories; turn dreams into realities; cross new borders; and be the best version of myself.
Happy New Year and I will see you soon.